I see a trend in progress. I see disaster on the horizon. I see the Twitter Train of Trouble barreling toward a cute little imported sports car…that has gotten its sensitive, run-flat tires hitched on the tracks.

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There’s an old adage….”Don’t burn your bridges.”

I’ve been thinking about that old adage a lot as of late…and about burning things… as the kids beg me to let them start a fire in our vintage fireplace nearly every night.  The one that looks charming but sucks the heat out of our poorly insulated vintage house.  And, I’ve also been thinking about bridges. And the whole concept.  And, btw, I know that I’m not supposed to begin sentences with “and”…but, I don’t really care.  I like to start sentences with “and” so please don’t write to me about it.  Ooooh…that sounded a bit defensive!

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As I stood atop the rickety wooden ladder yesterday afternoon, installing the enormous storm windows that help keep the heat from escaping through the single paned glass of my old 1920’s porch, the thoughts running through my head varied.  Thought #1:  I am going to fall off this ancient ladder and suffer life-threatening injuries while my 12 & 15 year old offspring yammer around instead of paying attention and hold the ladder steady.  Thought #2:  If I had a man in my life who was house-maintenance enabled…I wouldn’t be up here on this ladder, worrying about imminent injury.  Thought #3:  I don’t need a man in my life to do this sort of stuff…because, I can do it myself!!  Wonder Woman didn’t have a male sidekick doing her home maintenance chores, did she?  Thought #4:  Damn you, Drew, for dying on me…and taking all of your handyman skills to the afterlife, with you.  I’m sure they’re all kinds of thrilled “over there” that they have snagged one more guy who is not only capable of fixing stuff…but who actually loves to do it. But, I am suffering down here.  Thought #5:  I am SO tired of doing everything by myself…or, worse yet, remaining at the mercy of handymen who show up to put the storm windows up in, say, January. Or turn on the outside water in, say, September.  Thanks so much Mr. Handyman.  You’re nice.  And witty. But I’ll just do it MYSELF – before I lose another hundred dollars worth of heat!!! I thought we were in an economic downturn, for God’s sake. Doesn’t the lure of cold, hard cash mean anything anymore??

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